Fearfully & Wonderfully Made

Body Building Champion, Denise Richardson

An Interview w/ Bodybuilder, Denise Richardson & Editor, Xina Sy

"When I was growing up, we were called 'tomboys,' but I didn't care! I am who I am & have always just been me!"

At almost 55 years old, the 2x Ms. America, bodybuilding, fitness dynamo is positive about who she IS. And, after speaking to her for just a few minutes...you'd be pretty sure about who she is & what she stands for too! She is a no- nonsense, straight-no-chaser, tell it like T-I-is kinda woman! But behind the heavy New York accent & super-stronger than normal, muscular structure, is a gentleness that gives way to the true Spirit behind her confidence: her Faith.

Denise Richardson, born in New Bern, North Carolina, always had a love for sports; any sports. She would "play" anything: basketball, track, & even touch football. "My grandparents, David & Eva Richardson, would have me jump fences for the neighbors," shared Richardson, "I guess I just always liked putting on a show athletically." That love for performing paid off BIG for Richardson during her professional, competitive career as a bodybuilder, winning her not one, but two, titles as Ms. America in the Physique category. And, although she credits dedication, hard work, & discipline to her success, there is another obvious component that comes into play: Confidence.

I had the honor of speaking with her recently about her career, being a female, professional athlete, & her faith in God & in herself & her seeming ability to master anything & everything that comes her way. Below is a bit on that conversation...

XS: How are women viewed in your industry?

DR: In terms of competition, it really depends on the “mood,” whose show it is, and what show it is. For example: In many instances, the judging criteria changes almost similar to that of clothing fads. The standard is to look for symmetry, muscularity, overall conditioning, posing finesse (to music), and overall stage presentation. The judges that particular day, month, season, or year, may give higher scores in bodybuilding to very muscular women, tall and leaner women, short and not very muscular, average height and ripped muscle, tall model type and the variables continue.

XS: How does that impact your performance?

DR: It is “tres importante” that we do not try to fit into the “fleeting mood” or mode of the industry. Build and Sculpt as you feel and see FIT, (pun intended). Use wisdom but have fun and enjoy the better health benefits. YES, it is important that my posing performance is seen as SPECTACULAR by judges and MY AUDIENCE! However, it is still of utmost importance for me to call the shots and set the standard for my own physique. Hey, I’m part of the bodybuilding community because I enjoy bodybuilding, not to fit someone's mold of what I need to be.

XS: Has the industry & competition changed you?

DR: My profession was in Public School Education before I stumbled into DARBY PARK, and still is, long after after I won back- to- back titles of the prestigious Ms America in 1997 and 1998. I was truly blessed to excel in this arena for many years. I determined how I wanted this physique and frame of mine to look, feel, and speak!  My desire was to tell a  story whenever I stepped on any stage, at any time, and any place, worldwide!

XS: What are some of the prejudices you've faced as a female athlete?

DR: Politics and favorites at shows is always a bummer. Uninformed/misinformed folk who still think women should not workout---let alone have fabulous muscles, are fewer these days! One compliment I used to get over and over was, “And you don’t look like a man!” Clearly some still think it is not feminine to train and compete in Physique Competitions. As in anything else, women are unique and have zillions of looks, styles, "swaggas," etc! Thank GOD more people are coming to realize this and actually embrace a firmer, more toned healthier version of previous self!

XS: How does your faith come into play in your career as a bodybuilder & fitness trainer?

DR: I love and support others and encourage and train them to succeed. I am empowered through my relationship with God and it is ONLY through that relationship, the one with my Abba Father, that I can accomplish anything at all. I am STILL amazed at the Power of the Word manifest in and throughout my life. The bodybuilding is only representative of the faith building in my life!

XS: How have you cultivated a body-positive image for yourself?

DR: I designed and sculpted my body based on my decisions…Enhancing what gifts and genetics I had already, then building and training from head to toe, as this is what bodybuilding is all about.

Denise Richardson in Exhibition

XS: What tips for building body-confidence do you have for women struggling with their own self image?

DR: Presently, I mentor and train women (and some men) in the gym, on the phone, online….Most need encouragement and a boost or a jump-start to begin living a healthy lifestyle; to get fit and stay fit. Many simply need to be told, "You can do this and I will HELP you!” Many need to just MOVE and BEGIN…some know how, but need to take time out and make time for themselves. This is Y/our health. Definitely seek out reputable people; certified trainers, fitness educators, and other professionals--including your physician’s clearance to get started in any serious fitness program. Be sure to take precautions when joining the local gym…SAFETY is first, beloved! Once you get started, I promise, you will enjoy the many benefits! Pursue a HEALTHY LIFESTYLE…Feel good, LIVE WELL…LOOK good from the inside out…that is B E A U T Y….true beauty baby! Can I get a witness?

 For more information on Denise Richardson & her fitness programs, follow her on FACEBOOK or email her directly at: MsAmerDR@aol.com.

Such a Lovely Girl...

Singer, Ivy Love

An Interview with Singer & Bizness Womyn, Ivy Love
By Editor Xina Sy

"Sexy is the way you feel & the energy you exude when you are comfortable with yourself. I'm just comfortable with ME!"

Singer, reality-tv star, & bizness woman, Ivy Love does not consider her Self to be unconventional by any means! She believes she is just as natural as the next girl; just a little more FREE!  "I like to walk around naked. I like my skin to breathe. I am a nudist," proclaims the free-spirited singer-songwriter. "I also host swinger parties because I want others to feel free too," says Love about her chosen lifestyle as a Free Love Queen. 

My dialog with the very sizzling hot chica is as laid back as she is. Her vibe relaxes you & puts you at ease even through the pages of emails & instant messaging. Her answers to questions are straight forward & unassuming & you get the idea pretty quickly that there is absolutely nothing pretentious about this Sensual Diva. Ivy Love is as real as it gets & so are her philosophies on love, sex, bizness, & being body positive. What else would she be? She loves herself easily & effortlessly & without reservation...& she exudes that love through her music, her clothing line created by Mouth Watering Apparel, & through her very public persona; all unashamedly. You might not agree with her values...but somehow you just gotta love her!

XS: How do you define beauty?

LOVE: Beauty comes from within. Eating healthy and living a healthy lifestyle enhances your beauty and the longevity of your beautiful life! I don't even wear make up, unless its for events or for a show because I feel make up is for the stage. What you see is what you get with me! I like being natural.

XS: You seem pretty comfortable with your body! What are your thoughts on being body-positive?

LOVE: Everyone in this world is made differently and that is what makes us unique and special. I believe when you are healthy and live a healthy lifestyle your body will look great. At any size! I will have models of varying sizes in my fashion shows, because I feel all women should be able to wear lingerie and feel comfortable and sexy. True beauty comes from the inside and radiates outward, regardless of size. Read more on Love under pic -->

Ivy Love's Clothing Designs Released Under Mouth Watering Apparel

XS: How did you get the idea to start your clothing line with Mouth Watering Apparel?

LOVE: First of all Mouthwatering Apparel came to me after seeing my music video and asked me if they could make me some Ivy Love gear. They said, "Nothing is more mouthwatering than Ivy love!" Thank you very much!! They claimed they could custom design anything that I wanted to wear and make it for my people to wear! I first asked them to make shirts for my guys that said "Ballin w\ Ivy Love"  because my main following is males from 18-34. The rest just evolved into a line.

XS: How did the lingerie line come into play?

LOVE: I am a nudist and enjoy being free. But I also like clothes that make me feel sexy. So, I was then able to go in to the shop and custom design my own lingerie line with the designer. I wanted to make lingerie that is comfortable to wear and something you can wear in the privacy of your home and also out and about if you like... I only have two of the designs from them as of now!! But is will be out soon!

XS: What about your music? How did you get started? 

LOVE:   I first started singing when I was a little girl with a deodorant  stick in front of the mirror when I was 3 years old. A great teacher of mine made me learn opera in highschool and I also learned to sing in German, French and Italian. I have been making Ivy Love Music for 2 years and I love it. I am a performer and have an excellent message to give to the world. What motivates my music is the power to be able to influence the masses through song... with a great message of peace, love, and acceptance...


For more information on Ivy Love, her music, & her clothing line, be sure to log onto: www.ivylovemusic.com & www.mouthwateringapparel.com hit her up on twitter at www.twitter.com/ivyloves . Click link to check out her latest video, for her latest single, Meeting of The Minds.

Making Peace With My Body

By Pat Ballard, Author & Body Positive Activist

I think we can all agree that most women and a lot of men aren’t at peace with their bodies. How many women do you know who are totally happy with the body that they occupy? We’re always trying to change something about ourselves, no matter what size we are, no matter how beautiful someone else tells us we are – we’re determined to be at war with our body.


We don’t come into the world hating how we look. As babies and young children, we’re at total peace with our body. Hating our body is a learned exercise. And we have many teachers. Women’s magazines, television, movies and many other areas are constantly sending the message that if we aren’t tall, thin and beautiful, then we’re not adequate. But even the tall, thin and beautiful ones are at war with their bodies.


I was at peace with my body until I was eleven years old and saw a height/weight chart in a woman’s magazine. At that point, I realized that my “numbers” weren’t right, and I started down a long, almost deadly, road of eating disorders, self-starvation, laxatives and other attempts at staying thin. Why? Because a magazine said I was too fat.


But when my son was three years old, I decided that I’d had enough. I was on the last weight-loss diet that I would ever go on. I made up my mind that I would try to eat healthily, most of the time, and I would exercise moderately, when I felt so inclined. And I determined that I would learn to love the body that developed.

I knew this was going to be a challenge, because I had no idea what my adult body was programmed to look like, since I had dieted all of my adult life. But I was going to find out.


I also knew that I would need some help, going into this new adventure, so I wrote, what I called then, the “10 Commandments of Self Love.” These commandments later became the “10 Steps To Loving Your Body.” I used these steps when I’d start to think about going on another diet. Or when I’d start feeling frightened because my weight was continually climbing and I didn’t know where it was going to stop.

But a remarkable thing began to happen. As I practiced my steps, and started to gain confidence, I started to realize that people were reacting to me much differently than I had expected. I become aware that every time I left my house and interacted with the public, I got some form of compliment. What is this? I wondered. Don’t these people realize I’m fat? They’re not supposed to be complimenting me! But they did. And as my confidence grew, so did the compliments.

Then came the freedom. Freedom to actually enjoy and love the body that I was in. Freedom to accept the body that I was genetically programmed to have. Then came the peace. I felt as if I’d finally come home.



I’m going to share the “10 Steps To Loving Your Body” and I hope that everyone will start to practice these steps and learn to live at peace with your body.

1. Never stand in front of a mirror and think negative thoughts about yourself.
2. Never stand anywhere and think negative thoughts about yourself.
3. Search carefully for your good points and when you have found them, nourish them and build on them and cause them to grow daily. 
4. Close your mind to any negative words, thoughts or actions that someone might send your way. Don’t allow negative thoughts into your subconscious.
5. Always conduct yourself in an honorable fashion and don’t allow your mouth to appear larger than your body.
6. Always do your best to look like you care about yourself, as no one respects a slob, no matter what size that slob might be.
7. Learn what your best colors are, what your best hair style is, and what your best clothes style is, and never leave your house without being dressed accordingly.
8. Always, and without fail, smile and simply say, “Thank you,” when you receive a compliment. Never think or say that the compliment isn’t true.
9. Stop apologizing about your size. Expect everyone to accept you, respect you, and be happy with you just the way you are.
10. But most of all, you have to love yourself. When you love yourself, others will love you and respond to you in the exact manner as you feel about yourself.

A few years ago, I turned these steps into a book titled “10 Steps To Loving Your Body (No Matter What Size You Are). It may be hard to do some of these steps to start with, but try to force yourself to do at least one until you have it conquered, then move on to the next one. Pretty soon you’ll start to feel more at peace with the wonderful body that carries you through each day. To begin this progress, I suggest that you print out and sign my “Peace Treaty with My Body in the War on Obesity.” (Click Here)

Also, feel free to print the “10 Steps To Loving Your Body,” and put both articles in a place where you can see them every day. And always remember that you are a unique one-of-a-kind work of art. There never has been nor will there ever be another body just like yours. So treat it like the treasure it is.

Pat Ballard is Author of several Romance Novels With Big Beautiful Heroines & also the nonfiction book: 10 Steps To Loving Your Body (No Matter What Size You Are)
Website: http://www.patballard.com. For Her FREE BOOK! Something To Think About - Reflections on Life, Family, Body Image & Other Weighty Matters by the Queen of Rubenesque Romances CLICK HERE!

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Health & Happiness @ Any Size? Part One

By Dr. Peggy Elam, Ph.D.

Americans have been preoccupied with weight control for several decades, fueling and no doubt being fueled by a now-$60-billion-a-year weight loss industry. Yet almost all people who lose weight will regain all they lost and often more within two to five years, frequently ending up fatter than when they began.

 Body size is much more complex than the old "calories in minus calories out" equation behind recommendations to lose weight by eating less and moving more. Think calculus rather than simple arithmetic, with dozens of variables -- heredity being most heavily weighted (pun intended) -- figuring in the equation, and probably more than one unknown.

Yet from the exhortations of most health and fitness professionals and even the federal government to "Eat Less! Move More!" -- advice I'm now seeing some fat people refer to as "The Nightmare on ELMM Street" -- you'd never know that weight-focused health campaigns actually harm health by increasing the stigma, discrimination and stress fat people face every day, contributing to the rise in body shame and eating disorders, and failing to address the health needs of thin people.

The emotional well-being of women, especially, has taken a beating from public and private pressures to be thin. Even those who don't develop potentially life-threatening eating disorders often end up alienated from their natural appetites and self-regulatory processes, feeling like failures if they're unable to achieve what they or others consider "ideal" weight. And what are we to make of the rise in eating disorders hospitalizations for children under 12? Could it have anything to do with the way children across the country are being taught via "childhood obesity prevention" campaigns that chubby bodies are unacceptable and should be eradicated?

Prejudice toward very large people keeps many from exercising or sometimes even appearing in public for fear of being the object of sniggers and cruel comments -- or being featured as a headless torso in news stories about the "obesity epidemic." Others may give up any attempt at regular exercise if it doesn't result in a societally prized lean body.

Children who are bullied or teased about their weight are less likely to be physically active. Adolescents who diet end up fatter than those who don't diet, regardless of their original size. Adults, children and teens who diet are more likely to develop eating disorders than those who do not try to lose weight. Maintaining a stable "over" weight is healthier than losing and regaining weight, which can compromise the immune system.

Fat hatred and discrimination in medical, public and private settings negatively affect health in several ways. Sadly, fat women are likely to receive poorer quality health care than their thinner sisters. They are less likely to undergo preventive screenings and tests than thin women, even given the same number of doctors' visits. But many fat women avoid visiting medical professionals because they're tired of being told they need to lose weight even if they have no weight-related health problems. When they do have health problems, weight loss is often  prescribed with no acknowledgement of the poor track record of weight loss diets, programs, drugs and procedures, or the health risks associated with weight loss and regain.

Health professionals have often acted as though weight control is simply a matter of willpower and discipline ("Eat Less! Move More!"), which implies all fat people are undisciplined, lazy, or lack self-control, while pop psychology often sees fatness as the physical manifestation of emotional conflicts. Both views ignore decades of research and clinical experience indicating biological factors strongly contribute to body size and fatness, and that the body fights to return or stay at its usual size. Even professionals who do recognize the failure of ELMM approaches may encourage surgical mutilation of healthy gastrointestinal tracts in the pursuit of weight loss.

No wonder many people -- of all sizes -- give up on their bodies altogether, or alternate weight-loss-oriented restrictive eating with semi-starvation-induced bingeing.

Of course, people of any size can and do sometimes eat for emotional, rather than solely physical, reasons, but how such food intake is translated into body size is determined by a combination of factors, with, again, heredity being the most prominent. Feed -- or over-feed -- a roomful of people the same amounts and types of food and hold their activity levels constant, and you will see a roomful of people at different weights.

How can people of size -- or anyone tired of feeling miserable in and about her body -- maintain good health and emotional well-being without getting caught up in fat hatred and the pursuit of weight loss?  The answer lies in the growing Health At Every Size(SM)* movement, which advocates abandoning weight loss attempts in favor of weight-neutral healthy behaviors and respecting natural diversity in body size.

That means providing oneself with food and drink that satisfies both body and soul, regularly engaging in enjoyable physical activity, and getting plenty of sleep, rest, recreation, and other physical, emotional and spiritual nourishment. With such consistent love and caring one's body will settle at its natural weight, which for most people will be more than model-thin and for many will be what's considered "overweight" or "obese."

Rather than trying to lose weight or pare your body down to fit a clothing size or number on a scale, accept your body (and yourself) as you are and pay attention to what it (and you) really want. Sometimes that might be ice cream or a second helping at dinner; other times it will be fresh fruit or vegetables or the opportunity to move about with joy and abandon.

The ultimate payoff to shifting your focus off of weight and toward health at whatever size you are right now is better emotional and physical health. Why not give it a try? Check in on Thursday for Part 2 & Tips on How to Be Healthy @ Any Size & Resources from Dr. Elam...

Dr. Peggy Elam, Ph.D., is a Psychologist, publisher (Pearlsong Press, www.pearlsong.com), editor, author, artist. More on her work can be found at her blog at www.onthewhole.info. 

*The Association for Size Diversity & Health (www.sizediversityandhealth.org) is seeking the service mark for the concept of "Health At Every Size."